Tag: dealing with difficult people

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    Dr Braccio & Mike Austin of 1320 AM discuss BEWARE OF THE MANIPULATING “LOVE BOMBER”

    April 25, 2024- Someone falling in love with you is an incredibly exciting time for an honest person looking to love and be loved. The problem is there are persons who are highly manipulative and will take on the role of a manipulating “love bomber”. This is a person who will use all the psychological tools they can to manipulate you to or fall in love with them. Their ultimate goal is to take control of your life and totally destroy your self esteem and identity as a person. While even the most perceptive of persons runs the risk of falling under the almost hypnotic spell of the “love bomber”, the most vulnerable are persons naïve to loving relationships or desperately looking to love and be loved with someone in a loving magical relationship. As a result,anyone wanting to be loved and love someone is vulnerable to the “love bomber” and can fall under their sway. Love bombers are a form of sociopath in the sense they have no feelings for the person they are “love bombing”. Their goal is to have the person fall fully in love. Then they will gradually take control of their lives, isolate them from others and very candidly make them and their lives very miserable. The following are some things to look for that are typical of the “love bomber”. If you are experiencing some of them, the best advice is try to end the relationship as soon as possible and move on emotionally to save yourself from potentially a very damaging and destructive relationship. 1. In a beginning relationship ,when the person seems to be remarkably better than common sense tells you, you are probably right. 2. Expensive gifts way beyond the stage of the relationship. 3. Wanting to control all your free time. 4. Cutting you off from having time to see friends and family. 5. Warnings from family and friends you trust that the relationship is not good for you. 6. An attempt to mirror your likes and dislikes to a level of agreement that is unreasonable and clearly manipulative to show your complete compatibility. 7. The pace of the relationship is way too fast. 8. Praise and compliments that are way beyond reasonable . 9. Planning future events when the relationship is not at that stage. 10. Strong resistance with “love bombing” at any attempt to slow down the speed of the relationship.

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    Dr Braccio & Mike Austin discuss CRITICAL FACTORS FOR PARTNER EMOTIONAL COMMUNICATION

    April 16, 2024- One of the major complaints I regularly hear from one spouse or partner about the other over the years in my work as a psychologist is the lack of needed emotional communication and ongoing commitment to continue it. Like a garden,emotional communication must be addressed daily. If problems are not addressed and changed,they can lead to very unhappy relationships and too often can end them. The general belief is that this is more of a problem with men than women. Even if this were true, there are certainly many women who have problems in communication at an emotional level. With that said, it is safe to say each person is unique in regards to their willingness and ability to have effective emotional communication and commitment to it. There are some critical factors that are important in order for a partner or spouse to know the other desires a strong emotional commitment and is willing to work on it. This requires the willingness to share important things about themselves that allow a loving long term relationship or marriage to grow positively against all the pressures that can and predictably will occur over time. Critical factors would include the following: 1.Honest and authentic expression of feelings about yourself. 2.Be willing to be vulnerable emotionally and share how you truly feel about things. 3.Explain previous experiences in life to help explain how you have become the person you are. 4.Turn off electronic and other distractions for hopefully daily times to share feelings. 5. Try to use active listening to make sure you get the full message being sent to you before responding or interrupting. This can be very hard to do if you feel you are not being understood. 6.Recognize there will be rough spots where honest disagreements will occur and emotional communication will not succeed. Accept that and keep trying. 7. Be available emotionally during difficult times. 8. Hugs and kisses are important forms of emotional communication. 9 .Develop stronger spirituality with the possible support of a priest or minister could be helpful. 10. Seek out a therapist if you feel necessary to help give guidance on how to be more effective at emotional communication.

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    Dr Braccio & Mike Austin of 1320 AM discuss SURVIVING AN UNEXPECTED PAINFUL RELATIONSHIP BREAKUP

    March 26, 2024- The goal or dream of most persons is to have a loving, long-term relationship with a partner. Even if not in a marriage, the goal is the same because most human beings do not like being alone and tired of many ongoing and generally shallow relationships. The pain can be very difficult emotionally when one believes they are in a relationship that may potentially be lifelong, and it suddenly explodes into an unexpected break up. The person then is in great emotional distress even if they knew the relationship was not going well when it unexpectedly breaks up. Even if this is something that occurs in a short term intense relationship, that does not minimize the pain emotionally the person suffers who experiences it. The following are things to do if this occurs in your life: 1. Recognize that as painful as it is for you emotionally, you will be able to move on and most likely eventually find a successful, long-term relationship. 2. Try to determine what actually destroyed the relationship. When persons are blindsided and a relationship ends, there often were signs that were not noticed and sometimes did not want to be believed. 3. Try to learn from what happened to make sure it does not happen again. This sounds very simple, but requires a lot of personal analysis. 4. Recognize that most relationships that break up,whether long or short term, are the result of problems on both sides. 5. Without developing guilt and great remorse, it is important to see if you had problems with possessiveness, criticalness,, selfishness, envy, or what Shakespeare called the Green-Eyed Monster of jealousy. 6. Seek out friends and family who will be supportive with you during this period of difficulty. Do not overwhelm them with your feelings, but rather seek their support and love in difficult emotional times. 7. Accept there will be a painful emotional period of grieving for what has been lost and you believe could have developed. 8. Recognize the ending of the relationship may be very helpful to you psychologically if the two of you were a bad fit and only future problems would have occurred if you stayed together. 9. If you find it is impossible to sort out what has occurred on your own, seeking out an experienced therapist with short term and long-term failing relationships could be helpful to prepare you psychologically to be more effective in future relationships.

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    Dr Braccio & Mike Austin of 1320 discuss NARCISSISTS (NPD) AND SOCIOPATHS (ASPD)

    March 19, 2024- Even though we encounter them regularly, narcissists(NPD) and sociopaths(ASPD) continue to fascinate us. The fact they can be very charming and sometimes seeming to greatly care, makes them very difficult to deal with emotionally for a person who trusts easily and gives people the benefit of the doubt. The problem is that narcissists have at their best little empathy and sociopaths have none. The difference is that the narcissist has a grandiose sense of self and constantly needs others to reflect back their superiority and unique skills. Narcissism actually feeds on other persons agreeing and vindicating their feelings of superiority. The sociopath is totally different. The sociopath has no empathy and often uses charm and manipulation to get what they desire from someone. Because of their lack of feelings or empathy, they can easily cause great psychological harm to individuals who care and love them, as well as friends, business associates, coworkers, and employees who depend on them. The problem for the average person is that they often will humor the narcissist, even if they find them overbearing and annoying. The sociopath is much harder to uncover. Their acts of sabotage can skillfully be done with manipulation, lying, “love bombing” and being cleverly irresponsible in a way it is hard to determine what they are up to. If you feel you are having negative interactions that are impacting your own self-worth and happiness by spending time, or even loving a narcissist or sociopath, the following are some suggestions on how to help set yourself free emotionally: 1. Set firm boundaries on the interactions you will have with these persons. 2. As needed, separate yourself from toxic persons in your life regardless of the relationship you currently have with them. 3. Learn to be more perceptive when persons are simply looking for adoration or seem to be doing things that are making you feel less of yourself due to gaslighting behaviors. Even though this may be hard for you to process psychologically, the painful emotional results will be obvious even if it seems you are under their spell. 4. If in a psychologically destructive relationship with a narcissist or sociopath and not sure how to get out of it, seeking a therapist experienced with treating persons involved with narcissists or sociopaths to help you move away from the person and be able to lead a normal and happy psychological life could be helpful.

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    Dr Braccio & Mike Austin of 1320 AM discuss WHEN SAYING “NO” is appropriate and necessary

    March 12, 2024- It is amazing how many wonderful people who have the kindest of hearts and the most willingness to help others are often overwhelmed with responsibilities. They have agreed to enter into what makes their lives a completely stressful and overwhelming experience. When one thinks of it, “no” is just a word with two letters. When one considers we use thousands of words in our lives, it is amazing how that word can make life so difficult when one cannot use it. Way too many persons feel they have to say “yes” when asked to do something. This is often learned from an early age when they were children and their parents and other adults told them to always try to be helpful and do what was requested of them. It also can be true that persons feel saying “no” is hurtful and not being a good human being. Still others will not say “no” out of feelings of guilt if they do not do what is asked of them. Still others do it out of a sense of duty that someone has asked them and it would be wrong for them not to do it. Still others cannot say “no” to families out of love and sometimes engrained guilt. My point here is not that saying “yes” when a person is asked to do something is wrong. To the contrary, I believe helping others when we can is a noble and important aspect of showing and developing caring and love for others and ourselves. It also shows a commitment to the community and the persons we love and care about. The problem is when saying “yes” to too many things can lead to mental and physical health distress to the point a person cannot function effectively in life. I have worked with many persons in my offices and also have known many persons as I have walked the road of life that cannot say “no” to persons and constantly feel overwhelmed and not able to do what they desire and need to do to lead a normal happy life. They are like a golf ball being hit from one place to another with no control over their life. If this is happening to you, the following are some things to do to help you overcome the problem with not being able to say “no”: 1.Accept you have needs that must be met for your own mental and physical well being. 2.Never say “yes” out of guilt. Guilt is destructive and will harm you if you behave based on it. 3.Do not allow burnout to overwhelm you and not allow you to function. 4.Set priorities and boundaries and base your responding “yes” or “no” for requests for help based on them.5.When setting priorities and boundaries,be realistic in what you can do to have balance in your life.6.If you find you cannot say “no” when asked to do things,you might consider seeking out a therapist to help you set up appropriate priorities and boundaries.

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    Dr Braccio & Mike Austin of 1320 AM discuss HELPING YOUR CHILD WITH ADHD- Subscribe to our page!

    March 5, 2024- Life can be a challenge for a child who does not have any particular social, personal, or academic concerns. However, for the child who has been diagnosed with ADHD and shows some combination of the characteristics of lack of focus, inattention, procrastination, hyperactivity, and impulsivity, life becomes far more complicated for them and their parents. The parent of the child with ADHD needs to try to do whatever they can to help the child function to their maximum potential. It is important to know that many persons with ADHD can be enormously successful, as well as generally successful in life by simply controlling the extra energy they often possess when compared to the non-ADHD person. They can gain by being able to multitask much easier than the average person because their mind so quickly can go from one thing to another. The key is harnessing and channeling this ability to multitask into completion of activities started. The following are things parents can do to help their child with ADHD characteristics that are negatively impacting their ability to function effectively in life: 1. Make sure the diagnosis is correct. 2. Identify if there are any overlapping conditions, such as anxiety, depression, OCD, PTSD, conduct disorder, etc. that need to be treated. 3. Set up clear expectations of what is expected of the child and make sure they are aware of what they are and consequences if not met. 4. Take over the executive function in a way to make sure that things run smoothly because lack of organization, planning, and problems completing activities are core hallmark problems of the person with ADHD. 5. Keep the person active in sports and other activities that keep them motivated to do their best and channel what would be extra energy to other persons into the tasks and activities at hand. 6. Make sure you are not neglecting other children in the family due to the extra attention given to the person with ADHD. 7. Help teach the ADHD child who does not have good social skills how to share and be a good friend with others. 8. Work closely with involved school personnel, medical persons, and counseling persons who are involved with your child to make sure all are working in the same direction in helping your child… Because ADHD tends to run in families, there is a strong possibility you as a parent also have ADHD. If you question this and determine to see if this is true, seeking out an evaluation with a verification of ADHD could be helpful for you to better understand the characteristics of your child and offer support that can also help you. Your overall goal is to make sure you and your child are moving forward to help them overcome the ADHD characteristics that can negatively impact on their personal, social, and academic life.

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    Dr Braccio & Mike Austin of 1320 AM discuss SURVIVING A SURPRISE DIVORCE AT 50 OR OLDER

    February 27, 2024-Surviving a surprise divorce at any age can be very shocking,devastating and life shattering. A surprise divorce at 50 or older,called a “GREY DIVORCE”,can be particularly painful and difficult because at that age large percentages of couples have children out of the home,financial worries are often less and persons are thinking about a far less stressful future together in retirement and beyond enjoying their adult children and grandchildren. When this comes to a thunderous collapse and the person is now looking at a life away from their spouse or partner,life becomes a horrible mess. This would be true even if the two were not greatly in love. For many persons,they will have to sell their homes,work much longer than planned,lose many couple and joint personal friends,share what becomes limited financial resources,loss of security,loneliness,guilt,intense anger,low self-esteem and a horrible fear of what will become of them in an uncharted ominous future. The following are some suggestions on what to do when you are dealing with a “GREY DIVORCE” you were not expecting: 1. Accept your feelings and realize your grief period will be determined by you and not others. 2. Learn from the divorce but do not torture yourself for it. The marriage is over. 3. Guilt never helped solve a problem in the past. 4. Make sure the legal aspects of the divorce are handled by an attorney with broad “GREY DIVORCE” experience. The divorce settlement could relate to your current lifestyle and the level of work you will need to do because of your changed financial situation. 5. Do not bring your adult children into the divorce in spite of how hard it will be for you not to. They will have to emotionally work it out themselves. 6. Be kind to yourself and do not allow others to define who you are. 7. Talk to trusted family and friends about your hurt, grief and anger for emotional support. 8. Develop new routines to help set new paths in your life. 9. Seek out support groups and/or a trained therapist experienced in working with persons coming out of a “GREY DIVORCE” as you feel appropriate. 10. Do not isolate yourself. Do things and see people even if difficult. 11. Learn to enjoy being single as difficult as that may seem possible. 12. Develop your spirituality and purpose in life as you forge forth on your new life voyage.

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    Dr Braccio & Mike Austin of 1320 AM discuss SURVIVING THE DEATH OF A BELOVED SPOUSE

    December 12, 2023- There are few things in life more devastating psychologically and leading to ongoing and even long-term trauma than the death of a beloved spouse. Over time,the two persons in many ways become one.When persons marry for life, they are thinking about all the years they hope to spend together sharing loving experiences. They may also have dreams of having children and a wonderful family life. There is an intense feeling of happiness and an eagerness for the future. There are no thoughts of a plan for the death of the loving spouse. When this occurs, it is a totally shattering experience. While caring friends, family members and professionals can be helpful, there is no clear road for the person to navigate emotionally. And for sure, the emotional road will be one with great emotional pain and suffering. Additionally, there can be physical problems resulting from the constant emotional stress on the person’s body. When one does lose a loving spouse, it is critical the surviving spouse not feel a need to immediately address all the concerns that may be coming to the mind. The exception would be financial concerns that must be addressed.The important thing is to recognize that grieving is a very personal experience and there is no one right way to overcome it. Even though there is a need for family and friends to be supportive and helpful, it is a very lonely journey only that person can experience. Important things to do when trying to survive the death of a beloved spouse would include the following: 1. Surround yourself with family and friends to the degree you are comfortable. It is critical there be human support and understanding. 2. Seek out spiritual support to the level of where you are spiritually. If you believe in an eternal life, then you are aware God chose to have your spouse come first and that you will eventually be together again. 3. If you have a more secular view of life, then always remembering the wonderful times you had together will help you go to the next stage of your life without your spouse. 4. Taking care of yourself physically is very important. You can do damage to yourself physically due to your emotional distress if you do not eat appropriately,do not exercise,do not do personal hygiene and generally do not care for yourself. 5. Seek out online groups for grieving the death of a spouse or various community groups or groups with religious affiliation. 6. Seek out a professional therapist experienced in grieving the loss of a spouse to help give direction and support. 7. Do not make rash major life decisions after the death of a spouse. Quitting a job, selling a house, moving to another state, or any other major decision is best done after a period of time of reflection and dealing with the intense grieving that will occur. 8. Do not allow others to determine what is the appropriate amount of time for grieving. That is a personal experience that is totally different for every person. The exception to this statement is when the person grieving the death of a spouse cannot move on and can become a threat to themselves physically and emotionally.

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    Dr Braccio & Mike Austin of 1320 AM discuss WHEN TO STAY AFTER AN AFFAIR

    10-03-2023-

    WHEN TO STAY AFTER AN AFFAIR

    This is our third segment on affairs and their effects on relationships. We discussed why persons have affairs and what the person who had it can try to do to salvage the relationship. Today we discuss why the aggrieved partner chooses to stay in the relationship when the philanderer has true remorse and wants the relationship to continue. This remorse is the key first step in keeping the marriage together. Further factors would include the following: 1.Good friends who enjoy the company of each other and the sharing of their lives. 2. Similar moral and/or spiritual values. 3. Sexual attraction and sexual needs. 4. Children and the impact on them. 5. Common interests and joint activities. 6. Financial considerations. 7. Future joint dreams and goals. 8. Probability or belief spouse or partner will never again philander. 9.Emotional needs being met.10. Willingness to take part in counseling. 11. And most importantly,a strong bond of love.

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    Dr Braccio & Mike Austin of 1320 AM Rebuilding Trust After an Affair- subscribe to our YouTube page!

    September 26, 2023 Last week we discussed why persons have affairs. Today we are going to talk about how the person who had the affair can help rekindle the love in the relationship if the partner is willing to give the marriage or relationship another chance. It is critical that the person who had the affair clearly has remorse for what has occurred and tries to do everything possible to convince a spouse or partner what occurred was truly a betrayal, and will never happen again. The process will predictably be very slow and frustrating to the person who simply wants to let the past go and move on. That is not how things work in rebuilding a relationship where betrayal exists. When a person loves someone and believes they are loved equally, betrayal and infidelity are devastating to the whole underpinnings of the relationship and it is very hard to convince them they truly are the primary focus of the love of the person. The following are suggestions to try to make this happen: 1.Total authentic remorse. 2. Great long term patience. 3. Recognition the questions will keep coming over and over again. 4. Doubts about the authenticity of your remorse may be questioned for a very long period. 5. Always explain where you are when questioned during the rebuilding of love and trust period. 6. The timeline for forgiveness and building a different but potentially better love relationship is with the betrayed spouse or partner and not the philanderer. 7. A therapist trained in working with partners is philandering relationships could be helpful. 8.Spirtuality could also be a strong foundation for the rebuilding of the loving relationship. 9.Be aware,the betrayed person may never get over the affair and the marriage may end; however,it will not be because you did not try to authenticity rebuild a loving relationship.

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    Dr Braccio & Mike Austin of 1320 AM discuss WHY PERSONS HAVE AFFAIRS

    September 22, 2023-

    WHY PERSONS HAVE AFFAIRS

    Most of us are aware of a person or persons in marriage or monogamous relationships that have intimate relationships with other persons. The opportunities are many in such a fast paced society. The electronic world we live in today allows these relationships to be sexual, emotional, and a combination of the two without being physically together. My purpose here is to talk about why persons do this. The reasons are amazingly varied and can range from shallow sexual relationships to intense online emotional and sexual activity. We will talk another time about how relationships can be salvaged when affairs occur. Reasons would include the following: 1.Persons with an incapacity to commit to a monogamous relationship and never will. 2. Risktakers who enjoy the activity and hope not to get caught. They like living on the edge. 3.Persons who get caught up in the moment and determine they are going to do what they are going to do and not worry about the consequences. 4. Compulsive sex addicts. 5.Those who have affairs while under the influence of alcohol or drugs. 6. Persons who feel a lack of affection and the need to get it outside of the relationship. 7. A breakdown of communication between the spouses or partners that leads to the person feeling they need this and will get it one way or the other. 8. Poor self-esteem and the need to feel better about self by having another person pay them reinforcement and attention. 9. Concerns relating to conversations not taking place in the home and the need for discussion about them that only can occur outside of the home.10. Major physical or mental conditions of a partner such as severe pain, Parkinson’s disease, MS or dementia can lead to someone finding sexual and emotional satisfaction outside of the home. 11. Having children can lead to so much of the focus of the spouse or partner on the children, that the person feels abandoned and obtains sexual and emotional satisfaction outside of the home. 12. Physical separation for extended periods of time and the spouse or partner feels the need for in person sexual and emotional intimacy apart from the phone or visual communication…The point here is not to indicate any of these reasons, as well as many others, justify someone breaking the commitment to a marriage or monogamous relationship. The point is that affairs are incredibly common and it is critical that spouses and partners continually work on their relationships on a daily basis, and be aware that strong friendship is the glue that keeps relationships together. When persons take each other for granted, and do not treat each other like dear friends and let other priorities take precedence over their relationship, then affairs are often sadly the result.

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    Dr Braccio & Mike Austin of 1320 AM discuss QUESTIONS ABOUT YOUR MEMORY

    August 22, 2023 – We all have questions about our memory at one time or another. Oftentimes, memory issues can relate to high levels of anxiety, depression, prescription medications,drug and alcohol abuse,high blood pressure,brain injury,and the general stressors of life that make it difficult for us to remember things that are important or not important. However, it is also true that as we age problems with memory can become significant, and it is important that we notice when this occurs and determine what we will do to try to control the memory problems as best we can. Typical questions to ask would include the following: 1.Do you feel you have memory loss? If so, how? 2.Do you feel you have intermittent memory problems? If so, how? 3. Do you feel memory problems are causing you significant problems in your personal, marital, and/or professional life? If so, how? 4. Have you noted ongoing consistent memory loss? 5. Do you get lost walking or driving in neighborhoods you are very familiar? 6. Do you regularly forget common words you have used daily your whole life? 7. Do you sometimes talk “word salads” that you think are understandable but are not by others? 8. Do you ask the same question over and over again in brief spaces of time and have no idea you are doing it? 9. Who has noticed you may have memory problems? If so, what specific examples and concerns are mentioned? 10. Are you under significant stress in your life? 11.Do you have high blood pressure, insomnia, stroke history or other physical conditions that could relate to your memory loss?… If you answer yes to some of these questions, it is important you talk to your family doctor and a psychologist skilled in the assessment of memory problems to determine the extent of the problems and possible medical and mental health help to positively impact on the symptoms as much as possible.

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    Dr Braccio & Mike Austin of 1320 AM discuss FALSE BELIEFS ON MARITAL AFFAIRS

    03-14-2023-Considering how common marital affairs are,it is amazing how many false beliefs there are about them. I have found this to be true since beginning to work with couples back in the 70s to the present. Common false beliefs would include the following: 1.Closely monitoring the whereabouts of a spouse will eliminate marital affairs. It may help,but someone determined to have affairs will have them. 2.Affairs do not occur when there is good intimacy in the home. Even though the chances of marital affairs are less in such cases,they still occur. 3.Spouses who cheat do not love their spouses. While most would agree with this,it is sadly not always true. This is particularly true with the “one nighters” or brief flings. 4.Infidelity is just about sex. This is not true. Spouses often have affairs to show they are still young,desirable,attractive or to enhance their ego. There also may be anger,wanting to feel loved,need for affection or showing control. 5.Spouses who cheat once will always cheat again. While the probabilities are higher in such cases,it is often not the case. The possible shame,remorse and possibility of losing economic power,a spouse and family can be so powerful that once is often enough. 6.Marriage cannot survive a marital affair. While this is often the case,it is not always true. Hard work and total honesty as a couple can reset the marriage on the loving course it started out. Marriages also survive due to finances,low self-esteem of the spouse,lack of love,family expectations and responsibilities.

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    Dr Braccio podcast on Infidelity

    Dr. Braccio discusses infidelity and the costs of cheating in a relationship, particularly in a marriage. Infidelity can lead to divorce and parental disruption. Yet many stray anyway, prompting the question: Why? Dr. Braccio believes any marriage can be saved if both persons love each other and are willing to do the hard work to save it. He gives you helpful and proven strategies to do it.

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    Dr Braccio & Dave Akerly discuss DO NOT LET “ANALYSIS PARALYSIS” STOP NECESSARY DECISION MAKING

    DO NOT LET “ANALYSIS PARALYSIS” STOP NECESSARY DECISION MAKING Subscribe to our YouTube page! 1-18-22 Analysis-Paralysis Is the condition when a person is incapable of making a decision without spending an unreasonable amount of time trying to decide what to do. Anxiety is the natural outcome when one has this exasperating condition of constantly ruminating on even the most basic of decision making. While it is true one needs to give much thought to financial decision-making and a potential career choice, persons with Análisis Paralysis make it hard and sometimes even extremely painful in deciding even as basic as what clothes to wear in the morning or what to eat at a restaurant. A plan to overcome Analysis Paralysis would include the following: 1. Recognize the problem. 2.Seek out the causes. 3. Prioritize choices based on importance. 4.Take a time out when too much time is being focused on a decision.5. Make a choice and live with it. One cannot go back and replay decisions once made. It is a waste of time and can cause high anxiety. 6. Set a timeline on a decision and make it. 7. Recognize there may not be a best decision but ones with competing advantages and disadvantages. 8. In many cases, decisions made today can be changed or altered due to circumstances. 8. Never let perfect hinder one from making good decisions. 9. Seek out a therapist knowledgeable on Analysis Paralysis to help overcome this condition…The Important thing is to be able to make decisions efficiently without having Analysis Paralysis cause great frustration and anxiety for both you and persons you interact with in your life activities.

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    Dr Braccio&Dave Akerly1320 AM discuss COMMON MEMORY PROBLEMS THAT ARE NORMAL-Subscribe to our page!

    COMMON MEMORY PROBLEMS THAT ARE NORMAL 1-11-22 There are few things more stressful to persons as they age as problems with their memory. While these are legitimate concerns for many persons, there is too much stress put on persons who have normal memory problems that occur as they get older. Many of them take place with persons that have nothing to do with aging problems but high levels of anxiety, sleep deprivation, depression, inappropriate use of prescription medication, alcohol/substance abuse, and the effects of a diagnosis such as ADHD. The important standard on if memory problems are significant is if they do not allow the person to function effectively in life and take care of themself. Common memory problems that are normal would include the following: 1. Absent-mindedness. 2. Thought/Word blocking.3. Fading memories. 4. Memory retrieval. 5. Forgetfulness. 6.Scrambling facts.

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    Dr Braccio & Dave Ackerly of 1320 AM discuss SMALL WAYS TO MAKE YOU HAPPY NOW

    SMALL WAYS TO MAKE YOU HAPPY NOW 01-04-22 Last week we talked about making choices, goals, and resolutions for the year 2022. This week we are going to talk about ways that can make you happy right now. Being able to find things that will make you happy “in the now” is really important because being in a bad mood is not only bad for your mental health that day but can lead to an enduring day to day sadness and unhappiness that can lead to long term negativity and even depression. The following would be examples of ways to make you happy now: 1. Call a friend or family member. 2. Enjoy a happy memory. 3. Get love from your cat or dog. 4. Hug someone you love. 5. Focus on what is good in your life. 6. Listen to music you love. 7. Offer someone a smile. 8. Talk to an upbeat person. 9. Plan future events. 10. Eat something you love. 11. Exercise. 12. Walk around the block. 13. Take a hot bath or shower. 14. Light a scented candle. 15.Search your spiritual/moral values. 16. Deep relaxation/self hypnosis/meditation. 17. Take a break from your cell phone and all electronics. 18. Watch a comedy video. 19. Trust yourself. 20.Love yourself as much as you can love others…When you hear or read over the list I have put here, you will identify with many of them and also think of others you would add. The important thing is for each of us to find ways we can use that will give us joy and pleasure in the moment. Life is ultimately made up of all the moments/minutes we live. Minutes turn into the hours, days, weeks,months, years and decades that make up our lives. The more happiness and satisfaction you can find in each minute will ultimately determine how happy and satisfying of a life you experience.

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    Dr Braccio & Dave Akerly discuss SUCCESSFUL DUAL-CAREER COUPLES

    Dr Braccio- SUCCESSFUL DUAL-CAREER COUPLES 10-19-21

    We live in a society where more and more couples are both working and have specific work, couple, family, and work expectations that must be synced together in order for the marriage to be successful. The large number of divorces show that many couples are not able to navigate the difficult terrain to be successful. The following are suggestions that can help the dual-career couple succeed: 1. Determine prior to marriage how they plan to coordinate life activities pertaining to the marriage, child-rearing, financial goals, personal goals, and the breakdown of specific responsibilities each will have in the relationship. This will change over the course of the marriage based on what is occurring in their lives. 2. Supporting and enhancing each other as they together meet chosen goals that are mutually agreed upon. 3. Willingness to forgo personal goals when the needs of the overall relationship require this to be done. 4. Ongoing and sometimes changing roles by one of the persons to be the primary caretaker of the children and/or other responsibilities due to particular educational or career opportunities or responsibilities of the other. 5. Recognition that in spite of the financial and career success that can come from dual-career couples, disappointment and frustration can also occur when one or both are stymied from individual goals when the overall responsibilities of the relationship need to be primary. 6. The ability to make changes as needed that may require job changing or job adaptation. 7. Recognition a desired job advancement or different job would cause more harm than good for the couple and is not entered into. 8. Enduring love in any relationship requires openness, compromise, organization, agreed-upon role expectations, willingness and ability to change, mutual respect, and strong support of each other.

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    Dr Braccio & Dave Akerly of 1320 AM discuss why GOSSIP IS OFTEN VERY HELPFUL

    October 12, 2021

    Gossip is the sharing by a person of factual or unconfirmed information about someone or persons not there to an individual or group. Gossip can be positive, negative, or neutral. We often inappropriately believe it is all negative. We all gossip as human beings. It can actually go as high as 80 percent of our conversations if gossip is broadly defined. The point here is to give examples when gossip is good. They would include the following:  1. Healthy social interaction about sporting or work personnel. 2. Identifying dishonest persons. 3. To give warning about potential inappropriate behavior by someone who could harm them. 4. General human interaction about impressions of others. 5. Sharing of information that may be of interest. 6.Fun anecdotes that keep the conversation going. 7. Friendships based on good observations about others can cement them.  8. Learn and reinforce social norms. 9. Impact the views of others. 10.Resolve disagreements. 11. Assess and evaluate others and reputations.  12.Impact roles in your social group.

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    Dr. Braccio & Dave Akerly of 1320 AM discuss WHEN DIVORCE IS THE RIGHT CHOICE-Subscribe to our page!

    Dr. Braccio & Dave Akerly of 1320 AM discuss WHEN DIVORCE IS THE RIGHT CHOICE June 1, 2021 his is our fifth and for now final last segment on divorce. Much is appropriately written about the negative outcomes of divorce. With that said, the negative effects of dysfunctional marriages can also be such that divorce is the right choice for all involved. The following are reasons when divorce is the right choice. The first three are so horrible that they need to end in divorce. 1. Sexual abuse. 2. Physical abuse. 3. Emotional abuse. 4.Substance abuse. 5.Endless arguing. 6.Infidelity. 7.Severe lack of commitment. 8.Severe lack of common goals for now and the future. 9.Long-term neglect of the marriage. 10. Severe differences in parenting styles. 11.Changing spiritual outlooks. 12. Long-term family conflicts. 13.Chronic monetary conflicts—including gambling.