Category: Podcasts

    Dr Braccio & Mike Austin of 1320 discuss NARCISSISTS (NPD) AND SOCIOPATHS (ASPD)

    March 19, 2024- Even though we encounter them regularly, narcissists(NPD) and sociopaths(ASPD) continue to fascinate us. The fact they can be very charming and sometimes seeming to greatly care, makes them very difficult to deal with emotionally for a person who trusts easily and gives people the benefit of the doubt. The problem is that narcissists have at their best little empathy and sociopaths have none. The difference is that the narcissist has a grandiose sense of self and constantly needs others to reflect back their superiority and unique skills. Narcissism actually feeds on other persons agreeing and vindicating their feelings of superiority. The sociopath is totally different. The sociopath has no empathy and often uses charm and manipulation to get what they desire from someone. Because of their lack of feelings or empathy, they can easily cause great psychological harm to individuals who care and love them, as well as friends, business associates, coworkers, and employees who depend on them. The problem for the average person is that they often will humor the narcissist, even if they find them overbearing and annoying. The sociopath is much harder to uncover. Their acts of sabotage can skillfully be done with manipulation, lying, “love bombing” and being cleverly irresponsible in a way it is hard to determine what they are up to. If you feel you are having negative interactions that are impacting your own self-worth and happiness by spending time, or even loving a narcissist or sociopath, the following are some suggestions on how to help set yourself free emotionally: 1. Set firm boundaries on the interactions you will have with these persons. 2. As needed, separate yourself from toxic persons in your life regardless of the relationship you currently have with them. 3. Learn to be more perceptive when persons are simply looking for adoration or seem to be doing things that are making you feel less of yourself due to gaslighting behaviors. Even though this may be hard for you to process psychologically, the painful emotional results will be obvious even if it seems you are under their spell. 4. If in a psychologically destructive relationship with a narcissist or sociopath and not sure how to get out of it, seeking a therapist experienced with treating persons involved with narcissists or sociopaths to help you move away from the person and be able to lead a normal and happy psychological life could be helpful.

    Dr Braccio & Mike Austin of 1320 AM discuss WHEN SAYING “NO” is appropriate and necessary

    March 12, 2024- It is amazing how many wonderful people who have the kindest of hearts and the most willingness to help others are often overwhelmed with responsibilities. They have agreed to enter into what makes their lives a completely stressful and overwhelming experience. When one thinks of it, “no” is just a word with two letters. When one considers we use thousands of words in our lives, it is amazing how that word can make life so difficult when one cannot use it. Way too many persons feel they have to say “yes” when asked to do something. This is often learned from an early age when they were children and their parents and other adults told them to always try to be helpful and do what was requested of them. It also can be true that persons feel saying “no” is hurtful and not being a good human being. Still others will not say “no” out of feelings of guilt if they do not do what is asked of them. Still others do it out of a sense of duty that someone has asked them and it would be wrong for them not to do it. Still others cannot say “no” to families out of love and sometimes engrained guilt. My point here is not that saying “yes” when a person is asked to do something is wrong. To the contrary, I believe helping others when we can is a noble and important aspect of showing and developing caring and love for others and ourselves. It also shows a commitment to the community and the persons we love and care about. The problem is when saying “yes” to too many things can lead to mental and physical health distress to the point a person cannot function effectively in life. I have worked with many persons in my offices and also have known many persons as I have walked the road of life that cannot say “no” to persons and constantly feel overwhelmed and not able to do what they desire and need to do to lead a normal happy life. They are like a golf ball being hit from one place to another with no control over their life. If this is happening to you, the following are some things to do to help you overcome the problem with not being able to say “no”: 1.Accept you have needs that must be met for your own mental and physical well being. 2.Never say “yes” out of guilt. Guilt is destructive and will harm you if you behave based on it. 3.Do not allow burnout to overwhelm you and not allow you to function. 4.Set priorities and boundaries and base your responding “yes” or “no” for requests for help based on them.5.When setting priorities and boundaries,be realistic in what you can do to have balance in your life.6.If you find you cannot say “no” when asked to do things,you might consider seeking out a therapist to help you set up appropriate priorities and boundaries.

    Dr Braccio & Mike Austin of 1320 AM discuss HELPING YOUR CHILD WITH ADHD- Subscribe to our page!

    March 5, 2024- Life can be a challenge for a child who does not have any particular social, personal, or academic concerns. However, for the child who has been diagnosed with ADHD and shows some combination of the characteristics of lack of focus, inattention, procrastination, hyperactivity, and impulsivity, life becomes far more complicated for them and their parents. The parent of the child with ADHD needs to try to do whatever they can to help the child function to their maximum potential. It is important to know that many persons with ADHD can be enormously successful, as well as generally successful in life by simply controlling the extra energy they often possess when compared to the non-ADHD person. They can gain by being able to multitask much easier than the average person because their mind so quickly can go from one thing to another. The key is harnessing and channeling this ability to multitask into completion of activities started. The following are things parents can do to help their child with ADHD characteristics that are negatively impacting their ability to function effectively in life: 1. Make sure the diagnosis is correct. 2. Identify if there are any overlapping conditions, such as anxiety, depression, OCD, PTSD, conduct disorder, etc. that need to be treated. 3. Set up clear expectations of what is expected of the child and make sure they are aware of what they are and consequences if not met. 4. Take over the executive function in a way to make sure that things run smoothly because lack of organization, planning, and problems completing activities are core hallmark problems of the person with ADHD. 5. Keep the person active in sports and other activities that keep them motivated to do their best and channel what would be extra energy to other persons into the tasks and activities at hand. 6. Make sure you are not neglecting other children in the family due to the extra attention given to the person with ADHD. 7. Help teach the ADHD child who does not have good social skills how to share and be a good friend with others. 8. Work closely with involved school personnel, medical persons, and counseling persons who are involved with your child to make sure all are working in the same direction in helping your child… Because ADHD tends to run in families, there is a strong possibility you as a parent also have ADHD. If you question this and determine to see if this is true, seeking out an evaluation with a verification of ADHD could be helpful for you to better understand the characteristics of your child and offer support that can also help you. Your overall goal is to make sure you and your child are moving forward to help them overcome the ADHD characteristics that can negatively impact on their personal, social, and academic life.

    Dr Braccio & Mike Austin of 1320 AM discuss SURVIVING A SURPRISE DIVORCE AT 50 OR OLDER

    February 27, 2024-Surviving a surprise divorce at any age can be very shocking,devastating and life shattering. A surprise divorce at 50 or older,called a “GREY DIVORCE”,can be particularly painful and difficult because at that age large percentages of couples have children out of the home,financial worries are often less and persons are thinking about a far less stressful future together in retirement and beyond enjoying their adult children and grandchildren. When this comes to a thunderous collapse and the person is now looking at a life away from their spouse or partner,life becomes a horrible mess. This would be true even if the two were not greatly in love. For many persons,they will have to sell their homes,work much longer than planned,lose many couple and joint personal friends,share what becomes limited financial resources,loss of security,loneliness,guilt,intense anger,low self-esteem and a horrible fear of what will become of them in an uncharted ominous future. The following are some suggestions on what to do when you are dealing with a “GREY DIVORCE” you were not expecting: 1. Accept your feelings and realize your grief period will be determined by you and not others. 2. Learn from the divorce but do not torture yourself for it. The marriage is over. 3. Guilt never helped solve a problem in the past. 4. Make sure the legal aspects of the divorce are handled by an attorney with broad “GREY DIVORCE” experience. The divorce settlement could relate to your current lifestyle and the level of work you will need to do because of your changed financial situation. 5. Do not bring your adult children into the divorce in spite of how hard it will be for you not to. They will have to emotionally work it out themselves. 6. Be kind to yourself and do not allow others to define who you are. 7. Talk to trusted family and friends about your hurt, grief and anger for emotional support. 8. Develop new routines to help set new paths in your life. 9. Seek out support groups and/or a trained therapist experienced in working with persons coming out of a “GREY DIVORCE” as you feel appropriate. 10. Do not isolate yourself. Do things and see people even if difficult. 11. Learn to enjoy being single as difficult as that may seem possible. 12. Develop your spirituality and purpose in life as you forge forth on your new life voyage.

    Dr Braccio & Mike Austin of 1320 AM discuss LET ANGER BE A TEACHING TOOL

    Anger is not usually looked at as a teaching tool. It is often seen as something that can be
    useful in protecting a person from unfairness. It also is often seen as a destructive set of
    feelings that can destroy relationships and lead to failure at work,family relationships,
    friendships and in a myriad of other social settings that require a person to not allow anger to be
    a destructive force. When a person begins to see how anger is causing problems in their lives
    and recognizes it is a negative force that is hurting them and causing them great grief, it is time
    to take a look at how anger is hurting you as well as how you can use it as a teaching tool. The
    obvious question is how can someone do this? In order to have effective anger beyond the need
    for self-preservation and setting appropriate boundaries when unfairness cannot be tolerated,
    the important thing is that all people have flaws and failings that can lead us to have anger with
    them. It can even be appropriate anger that we can choose to overlook or minimize. The
    problem is that too many persons cut people out of their lives due to unreasonable anger,
    whether it be in a marriage, family relationships, friendships, work relationships, or any type of
    interaction that we have with persons. We can let anger be a teaching tool if we are really willing
    to learn how to let anger go and deal with it more appropriately. A way to do this is to develop
    our sense of human compassion, love , spirituality and recognizing there will always be people
    who offend us to one degree or another that will include some really good people. We need to
    take a compassionate view of people we interact with, and give them the benefit of the doubt
    and realize that most slights may be remembered and not appreciated, but are not of a type we
    want to end friendships or have ongoing anger that ultimately Impacts us both physically and
    emotionally in a very negative way. Trying to understand what motivates other persons and
    recognize that life is difficult for even persons that seem immune to stress and give them the
    benefit of the doubt can make for a far more positive life for us. You will find people who have
    many friends overlook flaws and slights and make themselves available to friends and others in
    an open manner and are rewarded with less anger and more happiness. Another thing to do to
    let anger be a teaching tool is not to take ourselves too seriously and not be out measuring
    unfairness by the teaspoon or making sure that we get what we feel we deserve when clearly
    we can be picky and unreasonable. Another area of concern that causes great anger in
    persons is when we are jealous of the success of other persons or whatever advantage we feel
    they have in comparison to us. That is really a destructive use of anger. If we want to use anger
    as a teaching tool, we need to celebrate the successes of others and try to learn from them or
    accept their circumstances or skill sets are such they are more successful than we are at certain
    levels. We need to disable anger by not comparing ourselves with others, but find joy and
    satisfaction in both what we have achieved in life and what we can achieve through effort and
    seeking out what we desire. The problem with too many persons is that they never really get a
    handle on anger and they either have too much of it or in other cases they are not able to
    defend themselves and need to learn how to use anger as a tool. The important message here
    today is not to have persons not be angry and in effect allow people to take advantage of them
    and not be able to set up boundaries that are necessary in life. No, the point is that anger is
    something that needs to be a teaching tool to us to help us be more compassionate, more
    understanding and broadening our view of why people behave as they do and recognize the
    things we may see as slights, and they may be, are not worth being angry about and if we do
    not watch out, we will end many friendships that have been very positive in our lives and can
    ruin many future friendships through the use of anger. Another basic thought is to try to mellow
    out emotionally and just enjoy life as it comes and reserve anger for clear cases of inappropriate
    treatment and an important emotion to help you put up boundaries when necessary.

    Dr Braccio & Mike Austin of 1320 AM discuss MAKE THIS VALENTINE’S DAY ONE TO REMEMBER

    02-13-2024-

    MAKE THIS VALENTINE’S DAY ONE TO REMEMBER

    Some people argue that Valentine’s Day is made too big of a thing and that what is important to remember are the 365 days that proceed it. My focus on Valentine’s Day is to set the stage for the next 365 days to get ready for the next Valentine’s Day. This does not mean if someone has been non-caring for the past year that all is forgotten and forgiven on Valentine’s Day. No, my point is that whatever has occurred in the past year, make this Valentine’s Day one to remember by showing love and caring for your spouse or partner. It hopefully will be part of an ongoing river of love or a new beginning of bringing back to vitality damaged love. Too often, persons who love each other are so bogged down with activities of everyday living that they lose track of each other. Choose to let this Valentine’s Day be one you enhance your relationship and clearly put a marker down you love each other. Some ways to do this would include the following: 1. Say I love you with words, a card, an email, on Facebook or any other way you can let the person know you love them. 2. A hug, kiss with words of love always are positive expressions of love. 4. Chocolates and flowers are typical Valentine’s Day gifts but the important thing is to give the person something that shows meaningful love to them. There may be something you think is important to give the person, and by all means give that. However, with that said, it is also important to make sure you give the person that special something that is meaningful to them to show you love them and want to give something they know you know is important to them. The range of what that can be is literally anything within reason that the person desires you are capable of giving. 5. As possible, spend a day sharing love in whatever emotional or physical manner that is important to both of you. Sometimes just

    sharing time is the most important thing. 6. Going out to dinner, spending a night in a hotel, taking a walk together, watching a movie are within a range of things that can be important. I am even aware of a loving couple who are planning to make a pizza from scratch and eat it with a glass of wine, a lighted table candle and a gardenia aroma candle. As the saying goes, whatever floats your boat is what you want to do. 6. On a more serious level, if there are problems in the relationship you want corrected, make this Valentine’s Day memorable as you show your love unconditionally and indicate you are willing to do whatever you can to make the relationship have as much love and caring as possible. Let Cupid’s arrow of love have full reign!

    Dr Braccio & Mike Austin of 1320 AM discuss HOW EMOTIONAL SUPPORT ANIMAL HELPS A PERSON

    February 6, 2024- An emotional support anima(ESA) can be a great help for an individual in this complicated age loaded with anxiety, depression, and uncertainty. Persons are still recovering from the Covid lockdowns that caused so much emotional havoc due to social isolation and the lack of certainty in life they experienced. Research has shown that during the Covid lockdowns there was a noticeable increase in anxiety and depression in children and adults. It also was found that persons who had animals received much needed unconditional emotional support. At a more specific level, an emotional support animal can greatly reduce feelings of loneliness, anxiety, depression, and post traumatic stress disorder that many persons are experiencing and having problems overcoming. An ESA is another living creature who will give you unconditional love, companionship and also the opportunity to hug and share time with an animal that can be seen as solid emotional support in an often unforgiving world. I certainly see the advantages for a person who feels lonely with a lack of love and caring to seek out love and affection with an ESA as a form of treatment to help overcome suffering from various mental health conditions and feel some relief from the symptoms that can make life very difficult and sometimes even cause suicide ideation. Fortunately, emotional support animals are available to persons when there is an ESA letter verification by a mental health professional the person needs the emotional support animal as part of their treatment to help them be able to better maintain their emotional life. In fact, they are not really seen as an animal in the home or apartment, but are considered an emotional support animal who is part of a person’s treatment for conditions such as anxiety, depression or PTSD.

    Dr Braccio & Mike Austin of 1320 AM discuss WAYS FOR LONELY ADULTS TO MAKE FRIENDS

    January 30, 2024- It is maybe not that strange that in a world with so much electronic contact and every imaginable streaming service available to a person, that there are so many lonely adults. A computer can never take the place of a living friend. While obviously there are also many lonely young persons, our focus here is on adults. One reason many adults do not have friends is that they were involved with friends who were the parents of the friends of their children. As the children became older and moved away, the friendships often retreated as everyone moved on to lead their own lives away from each other. The parent who may have been the center of family relationships may no longer have much close contact with family as children leave home and develop their own families and friendships. Additionally, the relatively shy person who does not feel comfortable developing friendships may have never learned how to develop them. Regardless of the reason why friendships do not develop in adults, they are critical for human beings to feel good about themselves from the vantage points of how others see them and they see themselves. The give-and-take of friendships can really warm the psyche of an individual. The great Roman orator and philosopher, Cicero, referred to a friend as “another you”. Someone you can share all your thoughts and feelings without being put down or criticized. The following are suggestions on what someone can do who feels lonely as an adult and desires friendships: 1. Make the choice of reaching out and determining to have a friendship with another human being, 2. Make yourself available as a starting point. 3. Call family and old friends to develop friendships in the now. 4. Join a club, church group, or any other organization and become an active member. That you have a reason to meet and interact with others could lead to friendships. 5. Take risks and share your feelings with a person or persons to develop a certain level of camaraderie and positive feelings about each other. 6. Be a reliable person while developing a friendship so that someone knows they can count on you. 7. Show the person you truly care about them. Talk about things that are important to them and let them know what is important to them is also important to you. If you have not developed or lost the ability to care for another person, work on it, and repeat affirmations you do care about others and you are going to try to understand them and relate to them as a caring human being. 8. Be willing to be vulnerable in a relationship and recognize there is potential for being hurt, but the potential for developing a friendship and being close with another person or persons make the risks worthwhile. This could be very delicate and difficult if a person has had problems with relationships in the past or has not been comfortable entering into friendships. If so,this is an area that needs to be worked on. 9. Seek out a trained therapist as you feel appropriate who knows about developing friendships to help you…. As you attempt to enter into a “New World” to develop friendships that can last the rest of your life, look forward to it.The voyage may be rocky and difficult, but the rewards are remarkable as being lonely is very sad and bad for a person’s physical and mental health.

    Dr Braccio & Mike Austin of 1320 AM discuss HOW TO SHOW PEOPLE THEY MATTER TO YOU

    January 16, 2024 We live in an age where more and more persons are isolated from each other and often their major communication is not with human beings but with computers and other electronic devices. This isolation also is enhanced for many by working at home, a breakdown in the traditional and extended family, less involvement and participation in community, social and church organizations. The rise in percentages of persons with anxiety and depression is not surprising because humans as a whole need and thrive with human interaction and the acknowledgment they belong and matter to others. Each of us can help persons by showing they matter to us. This will help enhance their self-esteem and desire to see more purpose in their lives. The following are ways to show people they matter in your life: 1. Make time for them. This is very basic and very critical. 2. Let them know they matter to you. 3. Explain how they matter to you. 4. Listen to their concerns with attention and sincere interest. 5. Show genuine compassion and understanding. 6. Be available in the present if needed. 7. Believe in and support their dreams they are trying to accomplish in their lives. 8. If it is someone you work with or regularly interact, always have a smile and be available if they desire to talk. 9. Be positive and do what you can to help the person kick out negativity. 10. Encourage hope. It is critical in good and bad times to help keep a person moving forward with hope as they do what they feel must be done to be successful in their lives.11. In discussions with them, focus on them and not you or some other person.12. Let persons know you are grateful for whatever they are doing that you appreciate. This can be family members, coworkers, employees, employers, community persons, political leaders, or anyone you have gratitude. 13. In the case of children, spouses, and other loved ones, constantly acknowledge them and let them know how much they matter to you. They may know you love them and appreciate that, but always let them know how much they matter to you. 14. Regularly verify over and over again that they matter to you…Some of these things may seem obvious, but it is important we let persons know they matter to us. When persons feel they do not matter to others, the isolation they feel in this electronic age can lead to not only depression and anxiety, but also even suicide ideation. There is no cost to letting persons know they matter to us and the benefits to them feeling better knowing they matter to others can keep or enhance positivity in them. You will receive appreciation from them from your efforts helping them enhance their self-esteem and performance in life by you singling them out and letting them know they matter to you.

    Dr Braccio & Mike Austin of 1320AM discuss SEASONAL AFFECTIVE DISORDER(SAD) IS BACK FOR MANY PERSONS

    January 2, 2024- Seasonal Affective Disorder(SAD) is a form of depression that occurs with the change of seasons. It tends to begin and end at the same time. It affects 5 percent of the U.S. population ,lasts about 4 months and is more frequent among women than men. It occurs in Michigan and similar weather areas during winter when it is cold,with short days and little sun. At a personal anecdotal level, I talked to four persons last week who all related they were getting tired of the overcast weather with the lack of sun and were getting run down and feeling sad. This condition clearly saps your energy and leads to a form of depression called SAD. Common characteristics of Seasonal Affective Disorder would include feeling sluggish, having low energy levels,sleeping too much or not enough, having difficulties concentrating on what needs to be done, substance abuse, feeling hopeless and even guilty for the feelings of depression, having no interest in things that normally keep the person interested and sometimes even excited, feeling sad and not enjoying good portions of the day if not the whole day, weight gain, changes in appetite that can include a craving for foods that are high in carbohydrates, and even suicide ideation and feeling it is not worth going on with these feelings. Fortunately suicide ideation is no not typical, but is something to be aware of in yourself or someone you really care about. There can be Seasonal Affective Disorder in the spring and summer but percentages are much higher in the northern parts of the country and world where there is a lack of sunshine, short days, cold temperatures and a high percentage of cloudy conditions without sun. These tend to be in areas far north and south of the equator. Causes of SAD would include a drop in serotonin levels, which is the brain chemical/neurotransmitter that affects the mood of persons and can play a major role in SAD. A lack of sunshine can also cause a drop in serotonin that may bring upon depression. Another cause would be melatonin levels which can negatively impact the balance of melatonin in the person which impacts a person’s sleep patterns and overall mood. Additionally, your biological clock – circadian rhythm – can disrupt your body’s internal clock by having a lack of sunshine that can bring upon depression. If you feel you are becoming particularly sad as the winter season progresses with the lack of sunshine, short days and cold temperatures, remedies would include medication for depression, counseling, exercising, replacing negative thoughts with positive thoughts, a light box that replicates actual sunlight, a good diet and even if possible a vacation in the winter to parts of the country loaded with sunshine and warmer temperatures. Many persons just accept they have SAD and do not do enough to try to overcome it. If you start having problems due to SAD with substance abuse, problems with work, family or school, social withdrawal, and for sure with suicide ideation or thoughts, it is time to strongly consider meeting with a therapist who is an expert in SAD and also your medical doctor for potential medication and advice on how to best take care of yourself mentally and physically. If it happens yearly around the same time, it is wise to seek treatment before SAD begins.

    Dr Braccio & Mike Austin of 1320 AM discuss MAKE 2024 AN EXCITING VOYAGE

    Christmas 2023-

    MAKE 2024 AN EXCITING VOYAGE

    Over the years, I have often talked about New Year’s resolutions, and how important they can be if persons try to follow them. I still believe that is true. However, this year I think a good way to look upon 2024 is as an exciting voyage where we can do things we have not done and would make our life more fulfilling. Most people get into a routine in life, and even if they do not like it, they tend to stick with it and even cling to it out of habit. That is good at the level that it can lead to predictability and success in one’s relationships with people, and in work related endeavors. The problem is that life is a one time event and it is important to try to make life an exciting voyage. Things that I would think would be included in this exciting life voyage would include the following: 1. Seeking out a partner to share a life with if this has not occurred for reasons varying from problems in previous relationships to feeling you will not be successful in one or fear you might be taken advantage of or be hurt. Regardless of the reason, now is the time to examine why you feel this way and try to make changes that would make a successful relationship occur. 2. Do a true analysis of your job and see if it really is what you want to do. Many people stay in jobs simply because they have them and have a fear of voyaging into something new. I think this is a mistake because too many people I know are in this situation. Others after retirement wish they had tried other things in their work lives. Work is an important part of a life and has much to do with a person’s self-esteem and how they interact with other persons and even who they interact with. 3. Take a look at what you know and what you would like to know. This seems like a simple thing, but too many persons just accept what they know and do not voyage into areas of knowledge that might make their lives and themselves more interesting and meaningful. 4. Seek out groups on the Internet or in person you might find interesting and could clearly make your voyage of life more interesting and exciting. It could include service clubs, church clubs,hobby clubs, reading groups, community organizations or groups of any type. 5.Seek out reasonable persons with different views to interact with to expand your views on life and the components that make it up. 6.Travel to expand your outlook on other physical settings and interactions with persons with different life experiences…These are simply some examples that could be helpful for making your life a more happy and exciting voyage in the year 2024. While these are somewhat related to New Year’s resolutions, they are actually broader and offer more potential fulfillment to your overall life. As the new year approaches, I suggest you take a look at the things you could do to really make for a happy and exciting life voyage in 2024. GO FOR IT!

    Dr Braccio & Mike Austin of 1320 AM discuss how CHRISTMAS CAN BE A TIME OF JOY FOR ALL PERSONS

    Christmas 2023 Christmas is a time of joy for Christians as it is a time to celebrate the birth of Jesus. Christians believe he was sent to earth to die for their sins so they can have a life of eternity with him and persons they loved and cared for on earth. Whether a person is a Christian or not, and there are over 2 billion Christians in the world, Christ was a person who came to show love and empathy for all persons. I can love and respect Mahatma Gandhi, who was a Hindu, for what he represented without being a Hindu. Who can really argue against one of Christ’s great commandments of the New Testament, “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you”? Who can really argue with his statement that only a person without sin should cast the “first stone” of criticism of others. Whether he was God or not, he was clearly a man of peace and love. A year ago I was talking about movies such as the Hallmark movies and how they can be so enjoyable during the Christmas season. I still believe Christmas themed movies and novels that present persons falling in love and showing great human kindness are enjoyed by countless millions of persons. The Christmas Carol ,written by Charles Dickens in1843, is a perennial classic as we see Ebenezar Scrooge go from being a pitiless lover of money and hater of Christmas to becoming a good Christian trying to help Tiny Tim and his family have a wonderful Christmas. It is true Christmas can be very stressful for a large percentage of persons and that can distract from the joy of Christmas. A study by the American Psychological Association showed 38% of persons had stress during the holidays. Hopefully, you can reduce this by focusing less on gifts and more on demonstrating love and compassion for ourselves, family, friends, and others we encounter during this period of Christmas. Our goal is to try to better develop our sense of love and peace by emulating the thoughts and behaviors of the Prince of Peace and Love, Jesus Christ. The emphasis on Christmas is not gifts but love with emphasis on communication with family and friends who are in the spirit of Christmas and reflect love, caring, and sharing positive feelings. Let us all enjoy the joy of Christmas in 2023 and remember the billions of persons who live and have lived trying to emulate the loving and caring ways of Jesus Christ over the centuries. It is Jesus and what he represents we are celebrating this Christmas, regardless of our spiritual beliefs.

    Dr Braccio & Mike Austin of 1320 AM discuss SURVIVING THE DEATH OF A BELOVED SPOUSE

    December 12, 2023- There are few things in life more devastating psychologically and leading to ongoing and even long-term trauma than the death of a beloved spouse. Over time,the two persons in many ways become one.When persons marry for life, they are thinking about all the years they hope to spend together sharing loving experiences. They may also have dreams of having children and a wonderful family life. There is an intense feeling of happiness and an eagerness for the future. There are no thoughts of a plan for the death of the loving spouse. When this occurs, it is a totally shattering experience. While caring friends, family members and professionals can be helpful, there is no clear road for the person to navigate emotionally. And for sure, the emotional road will be one with great emotional pain and suffering. Additionally, there can be physical problems resulting from the constant emotional stress on the person’s body. When one does lose a loving spouse, it is critical the surviving spouse not feel a need to immediately address all the concerns that may be coming to the mind. The exception would be financial concerns that must be addressed.The important thing is to recognize that grieving is a very personal experience and there is no one right way to overcome it. Even though there is a need for family and friends to be supportive and helpful, it is a very lonely journey only that person can experience. Important things to do when trying to survive the death of a beloved spouse would include the following: 1. Surround yourself with family and friends to the degree you are comfortable. It is critical there be human support and understanding. 2. Seek out spiritual support to the level of where you are spiritually. If you believe in an eternal life, then you are aware God chose to have your spouse come first and that you will eventually be together again. 3. If you have a more secular view of life, then always remembering the wonderful times you had together will help you go to the next stage of your life without your spouse. 4. Taking care of yourself physically is very important. You can do damage to yourself physically due to your emotional distress if you do not eat appropriately,do not exercise,do not do personal hygiene and generally do not care for yourself. 5. Seek out online groups for grieving the death of a spouse or various community groups or groups with religious affiliation. 6. Seek out a professional therapist experienced in grieving the loss of a spouse to help give direction and support. 7. Do not make rash major life decisions after the death of a spouse. Quitting a job, selling a house, moving to another state, or any other major decision is best done after a period of time of reflection and dealing with the intense grieving that will occur. 8. Do not allow others to determine what is the appropriate amount of time for grieving. That is a personal experience that is totally different for every person. The exception to this statement is when the person grieving the death of a spouse cannot move on and can become a threat to themselves physically and emotionally.

    Dr Braccio & Mike Austin of 1320 AM discuss WAYS TO KEEP YOUR MEMORY SHARP

    WAYS TO KEEP YOUR MEMORY SHARPE

    An ongoing common concern of many persons in this age of long living persons is their memory. With that said,even young persons have these concerns as they lead busy lives with a lot of stress and even human isolation in such a fast paced digital world. Working from home further isolates people and memory can slip with too much isolation. We will exclude from our discussion conditions like dementia and Alzheimer’s disease, that clearly relate to the deterioration of a person’s memory through physical brain loss and dysfunction. That withstanding,the suggestions made here can be helpful for them also to function as best as one can for as long as possible. Today we are talking about ways to help you deal with memory loss that are typical for most persons as we live our lives. It is also important to realize that in the busy stressful lives that persons live in at this time, it is not unusual to feel overwhelmed and stressed out at times so that remembering things can be difficult for even the most astute persons. The following are ways to keep your memory sharp in your lifetime. These suggestions would be valid regardless of whether your concerns of memory loss are psychological, physical, or some combination of both. 1. Keep your mind active and always seeking out new challenges and things to learn about in your life. 2. Seek out ongoing in-person interactions with others. 3. Keep physically active everyday to keep the flood blow to all parts of the body. 4. Keep your life and home organized to make sure you keep appointments, make necessary appointments, pay bills on time, and check off items on a required daily list as you do them. 5. Cut out distractions from your life to help keep your mind sharpe and tending to what needs to be done. 6. Sufficient sleep is critical to ongoing good memory. 7. Eat a good healthy diet. 8. Stay away from toxic people who cause great mental distress. 9. Meet with appropriate medical and mental health professionals as necessary to be as healthy as possible physically and mentally.

    Dr Braccio & Mike Austin of 1320 AM discuss OBSESSIVE-COMPULSIVE DISORDER (OCD) AND YOUR CHILD

    November 28, 2023- As we previously discussed, Obsessive-Compulsive DISORDER (OCD) can be a torturous psychological condition for even the brightest and most talented of persons. The cycle of obsessive thoughts seemingly only reduced by compulsive behaviors in a never ending cycle ,if not controlled, can greatly disrupt the life of the person with the condition. It can be particularly devastating psychologically for children and adolescents who do not understand what it is and believe it is normal that they can overcome obsessive thoughts by believing the compulsive behaviors will satisfy or eliminate them. OCD can alter the personality of the person with anger and high anxiety when someone tells them to stop these compulsive behaviors they believe must be done. Common obsessive thoughts and resulting compulsions include dirt which leads to constant washing of hands, constant reinforcement that what they are doing is right, extreme orderliness with clothes or whatever, belief they must pray over and over again to be forgiven for some wrong from the past,present or future, believing the compulsive behavior can save a life or disaster, and the belief their obsessive thoughts and resulting behaviors are normal and necessary to avert whatever is the fear they are eliminating . An additional concern is that anxiety, depression, insomnia,eating disorders and even suicide ideation can be side effects resulting from OCD. The following are suggestions on how to help your child or teenager suffering from OCD: 1. Do not believe it is a mental health condition your child will just grow out of. 2. Seek out an experienced therapist in treating OCD. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) in the form of Exposure and Response Prevention (ERP) is considered the gold standard for mental health treatment. 3. Talk to your family physician or pediatrician to discuss possible medication. There are medications such as the SSRIs that have been helpful in the treatment of children and adolescents with OCD. They are usually used with moderate to severe OCD. 4. Family counseling can often be helpful so everyone is working together. 5. In a sensitive manner, parents need to help their children realize OCD is a mental health condition that needs to be eliminated as much as possible. Children cannot be allowed to believe the behavior is normal.

    Dr Braccio & Mike Austin of 1320 AM discuss “DO NOT ALLOW PAST MISTAKES AND “WHAT IFS” RUIN YOUR PRESENT

    11-14-2023- Learning from mistakes in the past is a good thing to do. Thinking about things that we might have done in the past and wondering how they might have turned out can be interesting and also a good thing. These thoughts become a problem psychologically when we become overwhelmed by mistakes and perceived mistakes we made in the past and relive them and cannot be happy in the now. The anxiety creating “what iffing”is a classic cause of anxiety and can also lead to psychological turmoil by not being happy in the present and thinking about all the wonderful things that the person believes would have occurred if they had only done certain things. Of course,no one knows how events would have worked out on a choice not made. One cannot allow self to be negatively impacted by the past. If you find past mistakes or perceived loss of opportunities are causing you psychological grief,the following are suggestions to be happy in the present and not relive real and perceived mistakes in the past. 1. You can never COULD HAVE,SHOULD HAVE,MIGHT HAVE or OUGHT HAVE. Live in the NOW and do what you can. 2. Learn from your mistakes and use them as lessons in learning what not to do. Do not focus on them and cause yourself emotional pain. 3. As appropriate,advise others how to not make the mistakes you have made. This is a good way to feel better about your mistakes. 4. Do not emotionally torture yourself by replaying verbal and social interactions where you feel you embarrassed yourself. Learn from them. 5. If you cannot do this on your own,you can seek a therapist to help you experienced in such matters to guide you.

    Dr Braccio & Mike Austin of 1320 AM discuss HOW TO COPE WITH ENVIOUS PEOPLE IN YOUR LIFE

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    November 7, 2023

    Last week we talked about the tortured life of the envious person. This week we are going to talk about how persons cope with the envious persons in their lives. Because we live in a competitive society where being number one or the best in their field is often the goal, it is not unusual there is a lot of envy in persons who do not reach that level of success. There also are envious persons who do not try to be number one but nevertheless are envious of hard working high achievers who they compare themselves unfavorably. Envious persons also can be envious of persons they see as greater or more successful. Because there is so much envy in the world, and envy is a part of every person even if to a minimal degree, it is important persons learn how to deal with envious persons. We do not need to worry about persons who are envious of us but do nothing more than being envious. With them, we can be positive and supportive of their positive traits and achievements. To those who are envious and we are not aware, there is nothing we can do. The problem is when persons are envious and try to undermine us in our lives,they can be just out and out sarcastic and mean to our face. They also try to undermine us when we are not around them and they are with others. Rather than being overwhelmed emotionally and feeling horrible because people are envious of us and try to undermine us, it is important we learn how to safeguard our self-esteem and confront such persons. The following are strategies to use to cope with the envious person who negatively impacts on us at whatever level in our lives. 1. Confront a person and stand up for yourself, and do not allow yourself to be bullied or treated unfairly. 2. Let the person know you are aware of their envy. Let them know you are not happy about it and are willing to confront them if they become sarcastic or try to undermine you in one way or another. 3. Try to talk to the person and indicate the behavior puts a strain on the friendship or whatever relationship there is, and that it could end it. 4. End the relationship with the person completely and recognize they are toxic to you and your life is far better without them in it. 5. If you must interact with them due to family, mutual friends, joint leisure activities etc., then keep your distance and always be on guard and willing to stand up for yourself as necessary. 6. As appropriate, ignore the person and let them say as they will with no need for any more interactions. 7. Be happy with who you are and what you have achieved,and never allow others to define you. 8. As felt necessary, seek out an experienced therapist to help guide you when dealing with envious persons.

    Dr Braccio & Mike Austin of 1320 AM discuss THE TORTURED LIFE OF THE ENVIOUS PERSON

    Subscribe to our page! 10-31-2023 Envy can be torturous to a person who constantly desires the good fortune they perceive someone else is experiencing and are very upset emotionally they do not have it. It is a case where a person does not look at the benefits and gifts they have in life but constantly compare themselves with others and do it in a negative way. They can be envious of someone they perceive as better looking, having better luck, having more wealth, having a better personality, coming from a better family, having a more attractive spouse, having a better circle of friends, or any other thing that someone could be envious. The result is that the person suffers a form of emotional pain because they do not have what the other person has. It can be positive if it inspires someone to try harder to achieve something. That would be a positive type of envy. But today we are talking about the type of envy that hurts the person emotionally, and from which some persons never recover in their lives as they constantly find things to be envious. It is the rather odd phenomenon of counting the blessings of others and underestimating their own. The end result is psychological hurt and frustration.The causes of envy are often low self-esteem caused by difficulties in one’s youth. They can relate to poverty or feelings of not being treated fairly at home and in life. There also are competitive persons who simply must be number one even in areas they clearly are not. It is not by accident that envy is considered one of the seven deadly sins. At its worst,envy can lead to mocking the person for their perceived superiority or one can use sarcasm and other passive-aggressive strategies to undermine the person that one has envy. Ways to overcome envy would include the following: 1. Count and appreciate your own blessings and achievements! 2. Develop a sense of happiness that others have their blessings. 3. Make envy positive by improving yourself in areas that previously caused envy. 4. never compare yourself with others except for self improvement. Love yourself! 5. Accept you are an envious person and determine to overcome it. 6. Make changes in your own life to help eliminate envy. 7. Seek and find spiritual satisfaction to help overcome worldly envy and be happier. 8. If you feel it would be helpful, seek out a trained therapist with a person who is experienced in helping persons with envy.

    Dr Braccio & Mike Austin discuss HELPFUL SUGGESTIONS FOR DEALING WITH A DIFFICULT CHILD

    October 24, 2023- A person is very fortunate who has not had a difficult child at one time or another during the period they were being raised. In my work with parents trying to learn how to deal with a difficult child, my point is not to find fault with parenting techniques that have been used up to that time, but rather to try to find the best way for the parents to be able to work with a difficult child in the here and now. An important thing to remember is that children do not misbehave simply because they desire to do it. There is a reason for the behavior. It can be a parent is too strict or too lax. There are many other reasons that the misbehavior can occur. The important thing is to try to learn why is your child being so difficult with you. If it is hard to determine from all the possibilities ranging from a child wanting to control the house to a child simply desiring attention and willing to accept negative attention versus no attention,do not worry. The important thing is to try the following strategies to help you and your child: 1. Recognize you are a parent and your job is to model good behavior and not allow you or your child to be rude or disrespectful. 2. Regardless of what has happened to the present, you need to set up boundaries on what is acceptable and unacceptable behavior. 3. Keep control of your own emotions and not allow your child to create a sibling-like relationship with you that simply devolves into constant arguing and disagreement. 4. Seek out when your child is behaving appropriately and praise them at that time. The goal is to encourage and reinforce appropriate behavior. Too often the parent says nothing when the child is behaving appropriately for the risk of beginning a conflict. 5. Reward good behavior when possible with compliments and potentially with desired activities or things as long as it is not simply a child being good to receive rewards. It is important to remember that when children behave as desired,we often do good things for them and see it as appropriate. 6. Have few rules in the house and enforce them with consequences that the child is aware of with no surprises. 7. As possible, have family discussions where there can be agreements on what is appropriate and inappropriate behavior, and what are the consequences for inappropriate behavior. When this occurs, and you and the child are aware their activities have led to the resulting consequences,they then must accept the consequences as their own making. Successful family discussions relating to appropriate behaviors are not simple to do but something to work on as a family over a period of time. What are acceptable behaviors by you can also be part of the plan. 8.. Take into account your own temperament and personality when dealing with your child. It is very possible the temperament and personality of your child are quite different from you and this leads to a lot of the bumping heads that is occurring between you. Try to use an approach that takes into account the needs of your personality as well as that of your child. Understanding these differences can be critical in developing good communication between the two of you. 9. Recognize situations where there are high risks of problems occurring and plan accordingly for how you will react to them. 10. Make sure you focus on the problem of the moment and do not bring in previous problems lest the discussion become one of a list of problems and not a resolution of a current one. 11. Seek out a therapist who can help your child behave more appropriately and potentially do family counseling. 10. Seek out an experienced therapist in family dynamics who can help guide you to be a more effective parent for both you and your child.

    Dr Braccio & Mike Austin of 1320 AM discuss BE PREPARED PSYCHOLOGICALLY FOR RETIREMENT

    October 10, 2023:

    BE PREPARED PSYCHOLOGICALLY FOR RETIREMENT

    I have learned in my work as a psychologist over the decades that persons when getting ready to retire, often do it with planning about their physical and financial conditions. Without a doubt,these are important areas to evaluate when you consider retirement. The problem is too often persons do not think about what the impact retirement will have on them psychologically. For example, a job is more than something a person simply spends time at. No,a job impacts a person’s self esteem, friendships, and image to all persons they meet and interact with. Being a farmer, psychologist, bookkeeper , physician , governmental worker, factory worker, radio broadcaster, etc., is a major part of who they are. When they retire, they become a “retired person” and people see them as such. This can be fine for many persons, but many others do not realize the importance their job had on them in relation to status, levels of friendship, levels of authority and the constant interaction and challenges in the workplace. One needs to prepare for such a radical change to their lives. Even persons who did not like their jobs can miss the relationships and interactions that were meaningful to them on a day to day basis. I have known and worked with many persons who were not prepared for the significant changes that occur in their life after retirement. The “golden retirement years” can be depressing , lonely, and demoralizing when the person feels isolated,bored and even without purpose. They can even feel guilty at their failure to feel fulfilled with their retirement . A recent AARP study found 57% of retired persons say they had not prepared psychologically for retirement. The following are some suggestions to help a person be psychologically ready to retire: 1.Make sure you want to do it and are ready psychologically. 2.Do not let age be the primary retirement determinant. I will be 80 years old this week and have never thought a day of retiring. 3.See retirement as a new phase of your life with new goals and challenges. 4.Look for new dreams to be fulfilled. 5.Join new groups and rekindle old friendships. 6.Enhance family and spousal relationships. 7.Complete desired educational goals you desire to complete. 8.Meet with a therapist experienced in dealing with mental health of persons preparing to retire as well as retired persons. 9.Further develop your sense of spirituality and purpose in life.