Tag: advice

    THE POSITIVE OUTCOMES OF SAYING “NO”

     As we have discussed in the past,persons who agree to do too much and cannot say “NO” to requests can be overwhelmed by them.  Sadly,the statement—ASK A BUSY PERSON TO SOMETHING IF YOU WANT TO GET SOMETHING DONE—may be true,but the effects on the person can be devastating from a mental and physical health perspective as well as not allowing the person to meet their own priorities and needs. Saying “NO” is critical for a person to be able to appropriately care for self,family/children/spouse/parents,and other persons and activities the person chooses. The biblical statement whether implemented from a spiritual or secular humanist view is appropriate for the person who has problems saying “NO” to various persons wanting help-LOVE THE NEIGHBOR AS THYSELF. 

    WHY PAINFUL CHILDHOOD EXPERIENCES/PUTDOWNS TOO OFTEN ARE RELIVED IN VARIOUS FORMS THROUGHOUT OUR LIVES

     Inappropriate and unfair treatment in our youth can ingrain negative thoughts primarily about ourselves but also about others and anything else we experience in life. A parent or prominent authority person who demeans us and calls us names such as STUPID,IGNORANT,DUMMY,CLUELESS,IMBECIL,BASTARD,VILE,FILTHY,SHAMELESS/SHAMEFUL,HOPELESS,SELFISH,EVIL,GODLESS,FEARFUL,HEARTLESS,UNCARING,UGLY,ETC. in a never ending stream can impact us emotionally the rest of our lives. Even if not consciously,these negative views of ourselves can be ingrained and believed. When this occurs,poor self-esteem results in poor/failed marriages/relationships,underachieving work/academic performance,and overall unhappiness in life. It is critical to one’s self-image,happiness and overall success in life to not allow demeaning and destructive tapes from the past done by evil persons to still control our thoughts and actions. Begin to happily live your life with positive thoughts and actively shed your mind of old negative tapes. You will give credence to your own thoughts and define who you are. Go for it now!

    BEWARE OF THE OFTEN CHARMING BUT PSYCHOLOGICALLY DANGEROUS HISTRIONIC NARCISSIST

    Narcissists are persons who think of themselves as superior to others and demand attention,absolute commitment,adulation and constant praise. They believe the sun comes up in the morning so they may have light and goes down at night so they can better sleep. They lack empathy for others and have problems in maintaining meaningful relationships. They can be charming,dynamic,charismatic and the life of any party. They can manipulate good people to do their bidding and quite often psychologically overwhelm otherwise good persons into loving them.  They then take advantage of them because of their love and commitment to them. When you add the histrionic element to the personality of the narcissist,constant drama becomes central to the relationship. Such persons are often called DRAMA QUEENS AND KINGS. When one understands the Histrionic Narcissist,the personality flaws and behaviors are self-evident. What also is amazingly evident is how good persons have relationships with them. The veritable emotional avalanche of charisma and charm directed at the desired conquest can overwhelm the common senses  of the wisest of human beings. Because the Histrionic Narcissist has no conscience and acts only on the weaknesses and desires of the victim,their success is somewhat reasonable taking into account how powerful is the desire so many humans have for love and understanding from another human being. Belore long,the mask comes off and the histrionics begin. Potential victims need to run away immediately after recognition of who they are dealing with and long before the Histrionic Narcissistic can begin the psychological devastation they so effectively cause. This is easier said than done. 

    GO WITH THOSE WHO KNOW MORE THAN YOU DO

    Dr Braccio speaks with Dave Akerly of 1320 AM — GO WITH THOSE WHO KNOW MORE THAN YOU  DO—is good advice from parents to their children to help them advance personally and professionally in their lives. This was a constant statement of how to advance in life from my father.   He believed persons  learned and advanced in life if they surrounded themselves with persons who were working hard with the same goals. I have found him to be very  wise with his belief. In my opinion,it is a timeless statement for  young and old persons alike to be successful and productive persons for themselves,their families,their friends and all persons they interact. An equally wise counter statement of my father was—GO WITH BUMS IF YOU WANT TO BE ONE. A good rule for parenting is to to guide our children with who they choose as friends. If this is done wisely when they are young,the chances are far better they will make better choices when teenagers and adults. It continues to surprise me how often teenagers in problematic relationships come from homes where parents were not sufficiently involved in their friendship choices when younger. It is wise to have children involved in activities in churches,sports,school musical groups,Scouts,4 H,and many other organizations where discipline,teamwork and positive moral/spiritual beliefs are fostered and developed