Dr Braccio & Dave Akerly 1-26-2020
HOW TO HAVE A CIVILIZED CONVERSATION WITH SOMEONE YOU HAVE STRONG DISAGREEMENTS. The suggestions made here are based on situations where there is not a risk of physical or emotional abuse. Skill Sets that allow you to have a civilized discussion with someone you have strong disagreements are hard to find and develop in this world of the “cancel culture” where you eliminate someone you disagree with and never try to find common ground. I suggest the following strategies to use to have a civilized conversation. I must add personal disagreements go back as far as Cain and Abel. 1.Always respect the other person. 2.Accept your fears and concerns openly and honestly in your conversation. 3.Always respect the views of the other person as you present yours. 4.Be open about where you got your information if arguing a point on research. 5.Never use words like idiot, stupid, ignorant, imbecile, etc. in your discussions. This will quickly ruin the discussion and maybe the relationship. 6.Sincerely show your understanding of the other person’s position even if you disagree. 7.Never use sarcasm or pointed jokes that are meant to humiliate. That will quickly end the conversation. 8.Never be a know-it-all. Conversations and relationships can end quickly with a know-it-all. 9.Always voice appreciation to the person you strongly disagree with for the respect they have shown you in your conversation. That will lay the foundation for future civilized conversations. 10.Use of “active listening” where you encourage the person to get all their feelings out on a matter with no judgment on your part. The goal is to fully understand the position of the person even if you totally disagree. This is a hard skill to develop. 11.Never forget you can control what you say and how you say it. That is not the case for others.