November 3, 2026- Not necessarily. It depends on the circumstances. It is reasonable for a parent lying with their
child to read, hug or share some non-sexual time together of affection. It also can be reasonable
for the child to sleep with a parent under certain circumstances. It becomes a problem when it
interferes with the child’s emotional development to be able to become independent or can
interfere in the parent’s ability to have their personal life and be able to sleep in peace. Positive
and emotionally healthy situations to lie and sleep with your child would include giving support
and encouragement to a child who has had a bad day, upset after a nightmare, does not feel
well or just needs some quality time to hug and express non-sexual love and caring with a
parent. It becomes a problem if the parent is seeking emotional affection that needs to be
coming from an adult and not your child. It is a major problem if the child is afraid to sleep alone
and can have panic attacks and separation anxiety that could lead to very stressful and poor
psychological development of the child, and if not controlled, can lead to codependency.
Codependency is very bad and damaging emotionally to both the parent and the child. It leads
to a situation where the child becomes psychologically debilitated from a personality and
developmental level and the parent becomes equally debilitated personally and developmentally
by taking on all the burdens of the child to the point that each inappropriately depends on the
other in order to function emotionally. This is very counterproductive and will end up being a
disaster emotionally and personally for both. This codependency can begin early and can
extend late into the life of both persons. The overall point here is that it can be fine for a child to
lie and sleep with a parent under appropriate circumstances from ages 11 and under, and it can
be very inappropriate. I have given examples when it is appropriate and when it is not
appropriate.